At some point, you are bound to go through more lows than highs. It can become suffocating and seemingly impossible to build a resilience when life throws punch after punch at you. Professor Tim Wilson of the University of Virginia wrote the book Strangers to Ourselves: Discovering the Adaptive Unconscious and Redirect: Changing the Stories we Live by. In the book, Wilson gives some mind blowing insights into how the brain works. Additionally, the author outlines five powerful rituals that you can use to build resilience.
- See the positive out of every situation (it’s really not that bad)
This is based on what Wilson and colleague Prof. Dan Gilbert referred to as ‘affective forecasting,’ i.e. predicting your future feelings. Humans are bad at this.
- Tap into your psychological immune system
So you have heard the saying ‘time heals all wounds?’ According to Wilson, this is not true, a person’s psychological immune system heals all wounds. Your unconscious mind will eventually kick in and help you bounce back from a difficult time.
- Become your own storyteller
Research by James Pennebaker indicates that writing your feelings for a minimum of 20mins per day can help you a great deal. Wilson supports this finding and encourages you to write from a third person as if you are an outsider observing your life from a distance.
- Act more than you say
This is an extension from ritual number 3. Take a moment to review your life in an effort to understand your actions. Pay more attention to your actions without overlooking them for that overconfident storyteller in you. In this way, you will find an accurate depiction.
- Do good—just be good
In this ritual, understand the type of person you are based on ritual number 4. And if you don’t like what you have observed, then just do good things. Wilson Spook notes that when your actions change, so does your story. In this way, you build resilience from the core.
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